Does a New Year need a New You?

As you’ll be well aware we are in a prime ‘LET ALL THE MEDIA SHAME US INTO THINKING WE NEED TO CHANGE’ time period. Magazines will be shouting at us to kick off a healthy eating plan. Instagram will be telling us we need to get ‘Summer Bikini Body Ready’ and other outlets will be trying to convince us that the New Year is the perfect time to make all the changes we need to make to have a, “happier, healthier New Year”.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m ALL about using milestones as a motivation to kick start something great. But this post is a resounding FUCK THAT to ANYONE who tells me that a New Year needs a New Me.

As women we are constantly told we need to change. To lose weight. To gain weight. To look after our skin. To eat healthier. To cut back on drinking. To get in shape for Summer. These changes are all telling us that we are no good as we are. Again, I say FUCK THAT.

Why is it that the New Year heralds a time for change? Is it because the festive period has rolled around and we’ve all turned our blood supply into pure Prosecco and roast potato and we feel a bit sluggish? Is this the prime time to make us feel so incredibly shit about ourselves, that change is the only option?

It’s very convenient that so much money is plied into an industry which perpetuates the outlook that women are nothing unless they are slim, happy, cleansed and wrinkle free beings and this industry’s biggest money making period is the New Year. To that industry I say FUCK THAT.

The New Year IS a great time for change. It’s a great time to let go of the negative emotions and experiences of the previous year. But it is NOT a time to feel pressured into changing who and what you are.

If only there was an industry that promoted LOVING YOURSELF. An industry which could make money off of people getting ‘Summer Ready’ by ensuring they are happy within themselves and are ready to enjoy a Summer of not giving a fuck about any pressures that are piled on to them. Imagine Instagram (on the whole) promoted people who are perfect JUST THE WAY THEY ARE and not perfect because they fit a certain mould and have ownership of certain belongings. But we don’t, we have one that promotes the constant need to change, so FUCK THAT.

The counter arguments to my FUCK THAT attitude will invariably include, ‘Well what if I want to use the New Year as an excuse to change for me and not for society?’ To that I ask a simple question:

  1. If you want to change, what is it that is making you want to change?

If your answer is, ‘I don’t feel good about myself and I believe by making X, Y and Z change, I will feel better within my soul.’ Then crack on (but I have a further question for you and it’s a BIGGIE).

Who the fuck told you that by making changes to X, Y, Z you’ll be happier because you’re not fabulous exactly the way you are?

I mean, if you’re a cold-hearted sociopath then YES PLEASE MAKE ALL THE CHANGES but if you feel like you need to lose half a stone, or grow your hair, or wear better clothes or reverse the signs of aging, who made you feel this way? Unless it’s truly you and you alone who is making you feel this way then I ask you to tell everyone FUCK THAT.

I’ve felt the same way all my life. Trust me. I’ve done the whole ‘diet starts on Monday’ thing infinitely so I get it. Society has ingrained it into me that my saddlebags are grotesque, my lips are too thin and my slowly appearing wrinkles are ugly. There isn’t a day that goes by where I don’t wish I looked good in a body con dress, or my lips looked like Kylie’s and I had skin as smooth and luminous as Kim’s derriere. But as I’ve gotten older I’ve realised something. I’ve realised that those things ARE NOT what make you happy. Those things you think you need to make changes on might not necessarily improve your happiness. However there is one SURE FIRE WAY to improve your happiness and I’ll detail that in a bit.

But back to the changes – I’ve had the perfect skin, the bum that everyone complimented and the size 6-8 clothes hanging in my wardrobe and I was no where near as happy in life as I am now. I’m happier because I’m slowly coming to terms with the fact that I’m bloody incredible JUST AS I AM. Note I didn’t use the word ‘perfect’. I didn’t use it, because no one is perfect. No matter how many Weight Watcher classes you start to attend or how many litres of almond milk instead of semi-skimmed you consume, you’re never going to have things you don’t need to work on. But those things SHOULD NEVER be determined by society or by other people.

It’s true though, I am incredible and SO ARE YOU. I may not be what society deems ‘bikini body ready’ but come March when I’m in Florida, I’m sticking a fucking bikini on. I may not be the healthiest eater or drinker but I am so much more content with a steak and creamy mash than I am with a salad and lean chicken. I may not get my 2 litres of water a day but it’s a pretty big achievement to consume a substantial amount of gin in a weekend and not die. But I’m happy within myself (still a VERY long way to go) and I’ve realised that I don’t need to keep changing with every passing year.

So here’s your SURE FIRE WAY to have a happier and healthier 2017 which doesn’t include changing a single damn materialistic or cosmetic thing about yourself…

…Say FUCK THAT to people telling you you need to look a certain way, eat a certain thing, drink a certain amount or age at a certain rate. Say FUCK THAT to anyone in your life who makes you feel any less than amazing. Once you begin to love yourself for who you are, without any changes needed, that’s when you’ll feel happier. Losing a stone or starting running even though you hate it won’t make you feel any better about yourself. But looking at yourself and all of your amazing points will. Looking at yourself and truly understanding that the sixth belly roll or the hairy top lip DO NOT MAKE YOU LESS OF A PERSON will make you happier.

I won’t be changing in 2017 but I will be growing, those growths are going to be ALLLL about being a better human. Instead of losing weight, I’ll lose more hang ups. Instead of putting on weight, I’ll put on more fucks about the world around me. Instead of living cleaner, I’m going to live happier and instead of ignoring the signs of aging, I’m going to welcome each and every moment that life brings.

Sure, grow a ‘New You’ in 2017 but please say FUCK THAT to the impossible standards women are set and resolve yourself to grow, not to change. And if you really REALLY want to make changes – make sure you’re doing them for you and only you.

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12 Comments

  1. December 31, 2016 / 10:40 am

    Can I please shout: YES to this article! Finally a New Years post that actually makes sense and is all about staying true to yourselves and loving yourself no matter what instead of forcing some kind of change simply because everyone is saying to do so with no particular reason. My plan is to grow as well, to keep pursuing my dreams and to work towards learning to appreciate those little moments in life and focus more on present instead of constantly worrying about what future brings. But I would work on those things with or without the NY thing 🙂

    Happy New Year, sending you best wishes from Croatia! xx

  2. Kerrie
    December 31, 2016 / 10:56 am

    I love this!!!! This is exactly what going into a new year should be about, great post 🙂

  3. MakeErinOver
    December 31, 2016 / 10:58 am

    YES! 2017 will be the year I say FUCK THAT to a lot of things, mainly doing Christmas to make everyone else happy, im fed up doing thing for other people or shitty friends which end up making me miserable! 2017 will be all about making ME happy for once, bring it on!

    Erin || MakeErinOver

  4. Laura
    December 31, 2016 / 11:24 am

    YES

    No changes, am perfect as I am thanks!

  5. December 31, 2016 / 10:09 pm

    YES! I don’t ever use the praying hands emoji but if I could, I would. YES YES YES. I’m all for growth over change in 2017 xx

  6. January 1, 2017 / 10:46 am

    I love, love, love this post!

    This year I want to lose a little weight & get in shape, not because others say that I should or because I want to conform but simply because I want to. I want to challenge myself to be fitter, faster and stronger at the end of the year, not because some PT tells me I should be but because I am sick to death of feeling weak, sluggish and unfit.

    Whatever we do we should do it because WE WANT TO and not for anyone else.

    Emma | HarmonyBlaze.co.uk

  7. January 1, 2017 / 6:52 pm

    I love this so very much! As always you’ve hit the nail on the head!!

  8. Abi
    January 1, 2017 / 8:06 pm

    I think this is the best post that I have ever read! There is so much pressure to own certain things and look a certain way to ensure you’re happy. But are you really happy if you have those things? Everyone is fighting demons, and struggling with their own battles but we don’t show this off to everyone. All everyone will see is the ‘perfect’ side to life.

    My new years resolution is to learn to love myself, and be happy and content with who I am! I’m definitely going to start saying fuck that to everything else!

    Abi | abistreetx

  9. January 1, 2017 / 11:03 pm

    LOVED this! Your posts are always so motivating and bloody hilarious too. Happy new year! x

    Sick Chick Chic

  10. January 2, 2017 / 7:36 pm

    YES TO EVERYTHING. I love the idea of growing instead of changing, I’ll be thinking about that this year!

  11. January 3, 2017 / 11:01 am

    Thank you for writing this! Just discovered your blog & absolutely love reading your posts.

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