My Tinder bio includes a line about my blog. It’s something I’m proud of and it’s a big part of who I am so any potential suitor should know about it from the off. Just like my roast potato expertise and my rapping ability. But for some men, it’s a deal breaker.
Reason 47372 to love me and my blog: I can bring you on fun dates!
I matched with Adam, he asked about the time I had an in joke with Johnny Depp (another bio line) and we got chatting from there. His next question was, ‘What’s your blog about then?’ I replied that it was a lifestyle blog – chatty posts with reviews mixed in. He said ‘Give us a look then.’ I did. He never messaged me again. This isn’t the first time it’s happened and to be quite frank, it baffles me. Actually, it doesn’t. I speak quite openly about relationships and women’s issues here and for some men, I think it might be quite threatening. That OR they think I’m a massive geek.
I matched with Paul and straight out of the blocks he asked, ‘What sort of blog do you write?’ When I replied, ‘lifestyle’, he said ‘Phew I thought you were going to say dating then.’ When I explained that, actually, I could be considered a dating blogger, he messaged me this, before unmatching… ‘I went out with a stand up comedienne once. Part of her routine was ripping it out of the guys she’d dated and I just found it too intimidating so I had to end it with her.’ What part is intimidating Paul? Surely if you were a great date, she’d never have to rip it out of you? Insecure much? Didn’t want to date someone named Paul anyway. (Sorry any Pauls or girlfriends of Pauls)
Another guy I was seeing binned me after seeing #VixSwipes as he thought I was mugging him off. We’d been on 3 dates mate – you hadn’t even gone down on me yet!
There was also the guy I was seeing who I really liked. He explained that me being on Tinder hurt his ego and said to treat him how I’d like to be treated and would I like to see him on Tinder. So I stopped #VixSwipes for a while because he just couldn’t understand that I wasn’t using Tinder to creep, I was using it for fodder. Why would I wade through the cess pit when I’d already found a nugget? (Wait, weird analogy).
Me publishing old dating stories has also been a bone of contention – why would guys want to hear about previous dates? Would I like it if they banged on about theirs? Well, that was their argument. Actually I would. Might give me something to write about.
You might suggest that I stop speaking about my blog so that I can get myself a date and open up about it afterwards. Yes, that might get more guys to message me back after they’ve seen my link but actually – are they the kind of guy I want?
I look at fellow bloggers who have the most amazing blogger boyfriends. Guys who back everything they do, celebrate every success, wait patiently whilst their food gets cold for the perfect Insta shot and take candidly beautiful pictures of the girls they love. That’s the kind of guy I want. Someone who is secure enough in themselves that they can get behind their woman.
Maybe it’s writing about dating that is the issue but surely, a guy should be secure enough in himself to realise that if I’m seeing him – I’m not actually out dating? I might talk about boys in the Whatsapp graveyard but it doesn’t mean I’m delving back into the old bones.
Overall, I think putting my blog out there is great for sorting the wheat from the chaff (or the weak from the chav – as my mate says) if you’re going to love me, you’re going to have to love my blog.
And guys, if YOU love my blog, can you come and celebrate with me because I’ve only gone and been nominated for 2 AWARDS in the Thirty Plus Blog Awards. I’m up for ‘Next Big Thing’ and ‘Blogger of the Year’ and your votes would mean the world to me. Cue anxious carb, ‘what am I going to wear and how do I arrange my face if I lose’, loading. You can vote here and if you reeeeeallly do love me – could you ask your friends and blogger boyfriends to vote too?