10 things every basic wants for Christmas

*UPDATE* Y’all might remember this little listicle from last Christmas but I decided to update it slightly and repost it for all my newer readers. Enjoy…

I contemplated writing a Christmas wish list but swiftly decided that it would massively fall on deaf ears and would be too boring for words (clothes, makeup and half of H&M home yeah?)

So instead, I’m bringing you a (tongue in cheek) look at what every Basic will be hoping for…

The Body Shop at Christmas. Every Basic's local haunt.  The Body Shop at Christmas. Every Basic’s local haunt.

1. A £50 gift card for Starbucks that will last approximately 12 days because those Pumpkin Spiced Lattes are expensive, yo.

2. A Jo Malone candle*. Us Basics just love to burn money and what nicer way to say, ‘Smell how rich/frivolous with money I am,’ to houseguests than Mimosa and Cardamom.

3. A man that calls her baby and ‘treats her like a princess.’ Preferably who’ll spend 4 hours queuing in Pandora and will double check exactly which shade of blush her new Michael Kors bag should be in.

4. Rose gold dildo. She’s got everything else in this sublime metal. From plates to Converse sneakers, it’s time for something that would look great in her bedside drawer too.

5. A Beauty Advent calendar*. Basics love nothing more than spending £80 on 24 pieces of make up they’ll never wear for the sake of Instagram. Even better if they can eke out an ‘Advent Reveal’ vlog everyday for Vlogmas.

6. Something from Binky’s range at In The Style. Girl wants to party at a Vodka Revs and feel like the puffy reject from Kendall’s clique.

7. Muji Drawers*. The Basic’s equivalent to a trophy cabinet. “There was this one time, in Sephora, where I managed to spend £600 in 34 minutes. That’s got to be some sort of record, no?”

8. An Instagram photo that gets over 100 likes. Nothing screams the Season of Goodwill louder than a Basic feeling like Zoella for 5 minutes because her #tbt was on point.

9. Jingle Bell Ball tickets. Basics would die to fill up their Snapchat story with umpteenth videos of them dancing away to Little Mix with the Snapchat catfish filter on.

10. A present haul so huge the Bitch will get at least 4 vlogs and 2 blog posts out of it because the world wants to see the 15 pairs of fluffy Primark socks you got.

Ok pretty much all of these things are on my list too. Ain’t nothing wrong with being a little basic.

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  1. Courtney Williamson
    November 18, 2015 / 9:41 am

    Oh my god this made me laugh out loud!! The rose gold dildo got me!! Such a great list and I don’t at all blame you for the ones you want, we can all be a lil bit basic at Christmas.

    <a href="http://www.prettymadthings.com"&gt; Pretty Mad Things</a> .. x o

  2. November 18, 2015 / 10:02 am

    This rose gold dildo you speak of.. where do I order one of those? Purely for home decor purposes of course!

    Best xmas list ever!

    Carrie x

  3. Rosy
    November 19, 2015 / 8:41 pm

    I loved this, laughed out loud at the rose gold dildo, I don’t think this would surprise my other half because I literally want rose gold everything… might stop at dildos though… not sure I’d attract the right followers with my Instagram pics of it.

    Rosy x

  4. PinkyRainbow
    November 19, 2015 / 11:46 pm

    Haha this post is so funny! I guess I’m a basic bitch, also!

  5. PinkyRainbow
    November 19, 2015 / 11:46 pm

    Hahaha! This post is so funny, but sooo true! Well… I guess I’m a basic bitch, also!

  6. Saskia
    November 23, 2015 / 12:08 pm

    I’ve had a search for MUJI drawers and now I want them too!

    Saskia / girlinbrogues.com

  7. Fii
    November 25, 2015 / 9:26 pm


    all of this is so true my sides hurt. what a oblique workout :’)

    Fii x | {www.littlemissfii.co.uk}

  8. Becca
    December 1, 2015 / 10:00 pm

    So good. Pretty sure I got an email from Ann Summers about a rose gold bullet too. (They’re trying to tell me something I suppose) Would probably buy it though (jk) Ahh thanks for the laugh I needed it.

    Becca | theapresgal.com

  9. December 5, 2015 / 3:28 pm

    Oh god I am THAT girl who spent £600 in 34 mins in Sephora (in Las Vegas natch) and THAT girl who loves to see her money going up in smoke through a series of carefully selected expensive candles

    Stacey | <a href="http://www.expatmakeupaddict.com/"><b&gt; Expat Make-Up Addict </b></a>

  10. Jessica
    December 15, 2015 / 10:32 am

    I just read this AGAIN because it still makes me chuckle! I normally avoid the internet on Christmas day but I might have to create a ‘basic bingo’ game and see how many of these I can tick off…


  11. January 2, 2016 / 5:56 pm

    Hahaha brilliant. I love this post.
    Lauren xx

  12. Laura
    January 4, 2016 / 11:36 am


  13. December 2, 2016 / 2:41 pm

    hahahaha at the rose gold didlo!

    Out of these, I do want no:5. Beauty advent calendars look so pretty!


  14. Kara
    December 3, 2016 / 2:58 pm

    I’d happily see most of these things under my tree and I aint even sorry. Basic as they come. This post made me LOL – the rose gold dildo?!? ? So glad you’re doing Blogmas, can’t wait to read more! xx