The lovely Alice tweeted me on Sunday to ask where this post had gone. That inspired me to trawl my Blogger archive for any posts I’d been particularly proud of that hadn’t yet migrated to Squarespace. Turns out there’s only about 3. Lolz. This is one of them. I’ve even added/edited a few more bits so it’s not toooo boring for those that may have read the original.
I’m not the girl who
- Jumps out of bed in the morning.
- Spends 20 minutes blow drying her hair to perfection.
- Wears make up all day err day.
- Can even apply make up so it looks fancy and not just basic.
- Chucks on any old outfit and looks chic.
- Eats 3, healthy, square meals a day. Pretty much have a curry thrice a week.
- Doesn’t lose shit. Looking at you, bank card.
- Loves her job.
- Just picks up the phone for a natter. Too awkward, yo.
- Turns on a camera and shoots amazing blog photos.
- Photographs well. No matter which angle – 3 chins and an upper arm bigger than my thigh.
- Has a glossy YouTube channel. (Although I made a vlog once, laughed at myself (yay) then promptly deleted because I thought I sounded twatty.)
- Looks good in lingerie.
- Can even match her bra to her pants most days!
- Has perfectly even eyebrows all of the time.
- Is forever flush with cash.
But I am the girl who:
- Gets out of bed even when the going is at its toughest.
- Makes a mean cheeseboard – with chutney and everything!
- Marathon watches TV shows and isn’t even a little bit sorry.
- Looks after 25 children every day.
- Gives parents a comforting hug and a word of advice when they are struggling.
- Sets up her own mini business – whilst blogging and teaching.
- Effectively uses the cost per wear argument to justify every clothing purchase.
- Affords holidays AND the money to sustain energy with food and drink whilst there.
- Doesn’t throw up whilst drunk.
- DOES rap whilst drunk.
- Makes people belly laugh.
- Will make a tit of herself for the purpose of entertainment. Mainly on Periscope.
- Wins almost every round of Cards Against Humanity.
- And Monopoly, Scrabble, Pointless – competitive.
- Can forgive.
- Is always there for her friends.
- Knows she isn’t perfect.
- Posts a mean flat-lay to her Instagram.
- Knows which Instagram filters are her friends.
- Can wash clothes, dishes and surfaces. Adult.
- Makes her mummy laugh when she’s poorly and at the end of her tether.
- Tells her sister straight.
You’ll never be perfect, but there’s always a lot more good about you, than bad.
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