The Pussy Pedestal

In dating, it’s very easy to lose sense of who you are. You’re so concerned with presenting the best version of yourself that ‘yourself’ can slip away. This is dangerous because the lower you feel about yourself, the higher you put the pussy on the pedestal.

What is the pussy pedestal? It’s a super lofty place that you rest potential matches or people you are seeing when you feel particularly bad about yourself. Putting the pussy on a pedestal means that you believe whoever you are dating or talking to is too good for you.

You start convincing yourself they are talking to or dating other people that are funnier or more attractive than you. You begin to believe that the pussy is so wonderful that you do not deserve it. That it’s above you. That at any moment they are going to dump you or ghost on you because they realised they are better than you.

The Pussy Pedestal is genderless – unfortunately ‘Todger on the Top Shelf’ doesn’t have the same ring to it. It is also completely perspective based.

When you’re on top form, you’re looking your best, your date banter is ridic and the connection is off the chain, the pedestal doesn’t exist. You know you’re rocking the fledgling relationship because the person who you’re connecting with totally digs all of your shit. However, when the zip on your dress is broke, you got hotdog juice down your chin or you haven’t heard from bae in 12+ hours, the pedestal starts creeping in.

The pedestal must be banished from your brain. Bogging yourself down with anxieties over whether your date has gone off you or whether they’ve realised they’ve settled for you and want to go off chasing a 10, is toxic.

Yes, in dating, people will go off you – heck you’ve definitely gone off people – but it doesn’t mean that you’re less than them. Or that you’re not enough. For whatever reason that the conversation didn’t get off the ground or the multiple dates didn’t turn into a full blown relationship, it’s not about you not being good enough. Sometimes it’s timing, or a lack of spark. Most of the time it’s that the other person is a complete cockwomble but it is never about you.

The only way to stop putting the pussy on a pedestal is to have more self believe. To know that you’re attractive, funny, kind and caring and any person worthy of what you’ve got to give will eventually come along. And anyone that treats you poorly or makes you feel like you’re beneath them can suck a juicy fat one. Their pussy isn’t worth the pedestal any way.

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2 Comments

  1. WhatLydDid
    July 21, 2016 / 10:46 am

    Another post that has me applauding and screaming ‘GIVE HER ALL THE AWARDS’ to my screen!

    I totally agree with this, the phrase ‘confidence is sexy’ is there for a reason. My best dating advice is to ask yourself how you would react if a non-romantic interest treated you the same way. If they made me feel inferior, I’d drop them like a stone.

  2. Lara Loveless
    September 16, 2016 / 7:36 pm

    "Complete cockwomble" – definitely using that one in future!