11 things single girls are tired of hearing

I stumbled upon this article, by the Metro, ’11 reasons the hottest girls are always single’, and it irked me. It irked me reeeeeaaaal good. I wish I could clap hand emoji when I say… STOP. DEFINING. WOMEN. BY. THEIR. ATTRACTIVENESS. We are tired of hearing the following:

*with certain weak dispositioned people reading my blog but hating my writing style, I encourage you all to sound a klaxon if you see a swear word. C’mon it’ll be fun.

1. We’re single because of our personalities. YES some egotistical man bitches feel threatened by women that are strong, feisty and independent but it’s not why we’re single. Why do men decide that our personalities are too big and that’s why they’re not interested? Maybe we could tell on date 1 they’d be threatened by us and our downstairs went as dry as a desert?

2. We’re single because we have friends. Hot girls don’t dump their friends for guys. On the flipside – why would a man want to be with someone who dumps their friends to be with him? Why do they want someone clingy and not an Independent Woman? Throw your hands up at meh.

3. We’re single because we’re not desperate. Why does it have to be one extreme or the other? Why does it have to be that we’re single because we’re too desperate or single because we’re unavailable? Why can’t it be, we’re single because we just want to be? Oh and just because you’re on dating apps to find a man, doesn’t make you desperate. Just desperate to not meet the douchenozzle that wrote this article in real life.

4. We’re single because men aren’t our priority. The ACTUAL point from this article reads, ‘Nice girls turn up on time, stay sober, act interested and consider the fact that chemistry isn’t always immediate but that love can grow with patience. Sexy girls cancel on you because they didn’t get to bed until 5am the night before but promise to make it up to you.’ Sorry but WHY isn’t the nice girl considered ‘sexy’ and why does the rude chick that flakes and can’t get her shit together get deemed sexy? ALSO sorry but why are ‘nice’ and ‘sexy’ mutually exclusive?

5.  We’re single because we’re sexually adventurous. From reading the article, I can’t quite tell what point the writer is trying to make here. Hot girls put it about so no one wants to wife them up? Nah bruv. We boinked you on the first date, hated your oral game so decided to never see you again. NOT the other way around.

6. We’re single because we’re ambitious. I can *kind of* see where this is coming from. Single girls that are choosing other life fulfilments than just finding a man are out there. Women are choosing careers and hobbies to dedicate their time to rather than a man hunt. But also, WOMEN CAN MULTITASK. Infact I can Tinder on my commute, Bumble during my lunch break and ignore freaky POF messages whilst drinking cocktails. We can actually have it all, thanks.

7. We’re single because we can’t be tamed. Sorry. WHAT? Who the fuck needs to control anyone else’s freedom? Plus, being unreliable and incapable of compromise isn’t sexy. It’s cunty.

8. We’re single because we don’t settle. Another point I can get on board with. Women who jog men on as soon as they have decided they aren’t the one are strong and fierce and someone not shacking up with any old arsehole is a great character trait. Hot though?

9. We’re single because we don’t conform. Yep. On board with this. So I’m nearly 30? So what if my ovaries ache at every newborn announcement? So what if I’m getting trashed on tequila at mates’ weddings and performing the entire Single Ladies dance routine? Nobodies going to dictate what I should and shouldn’t be doing and that is hot. Society can suck it’s mum, rudeboy.

10. We’re single because we dress however we want. *clears throat to quote the indefensible*, ‘Five inch heels and a chiffon blouse to work. Hot’. Do you know what is hot? Not having to dress like an amateur porn star from ‘Secretary Sucks 3’ just to attract attention. Because we’re actually comfortable within ourselves and know we’re buff even in a bin bag.

11. We’re single because men presume we’re taken. If this is the case. GUYS I’M SINGLE. Stop being all intimidated and shit.

I think my main problem with this article is the use of the word ‘hot’. What are they imagining when they think of a hot woman? I would love to know your thoughts on this too.

PS. The original article was written by a woman like WHUT.

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13 Comments

  1. August 16, 2016 / 4:23 pm

    No words to explain how much I love this post!

    Emma x
    emmasjoys.blogspot.com

  2. Lydia
    August 16, 2016 / 4:56 pm

    I just wanted to say that I really love reading your posts. Your blog is so refreshing, funny and smart in comparison to all the others that I read. x

  3. OliviaCherylx
    August 16, 2016 / 5:34 pm

    Your response to every single one is classic!! I am single and want to be for a while now I’m done with relationships haha! Xx

    OliviaCheryl.com

  4. Sarah
    August 16, 2016 / 6:33 pm

    I wish they put the most obvious one, personally I’m single as everyone I’ve been on a date with or been in a relationship started off or ended up being a complete c*nt. Until someone turns up that’s not I give up! x

  5. Jenn
    August 16, 2016 / 10:18 pm

    I wonder how much the original writer got paid to produce such unimaginative and degrading bullsh*t. I’m sick of articles like that that just belittle us ladies.

  6. Lauren Aitchison
    August 18, 2016 / 7:01 am

    POINT 4! Somewhere in my teen years it was pounded into my head that ‘nice’ and ‘sexy’ WERE mutually exclusive and it’s a weird insecurity I’ve been battling ever since.

  7. August 18, 2016 / 1:46 pm

    I love this, your response to each point made me roll laughing. My youngest daughter was in a relationship for almost 2.5 years and has been single for a year at the beginning of Sept and she is so sick of hearing the "single" stuff, it’s either that or she’s being set up with all her friends boyfriends mates which she doesn’t want either, she is quite happy being single and doing her own thing xx

    <a href="http://www.mammafulzo.com/"><b&gt; Zoe ♥ MammafulZo </b></a>

  8. Katie Shannon
    August 18, 2016 / 4:03 pm

    Yes! Hear hear and I hope the idiot who wrote the metro reads this. Every response was perfection and I agree with every one! Who came up with the idea that "nice" girls cant be sexy or adventurous anyway?

  9. Ada Lovelace
    August 19, 2016 / 10:17 am

    Ha, your responses are epic! Everything about that shitpile of an article can get in the bin. So "sexy" means you have to stay out late and only girls with no personality end up in relationships? Wow. The Metro really know how to insult pretty much everyone at once huh.

  10. Saphfire
    August 20, 2016 / 4:33 am

    I came here from Gracie’s Youtube! Can you say INSTALOVE! This list is hilarious and I’m here for all of it. I was hooked from the "hand clap emojis". This article is shit and honestly most of the shitty things I see written about women were written by other women which blows my mind. The other day I was reading a DIY blog of all things and she said "it was hard to flip all the letters; too much for my tiny lady brain to handle…" Whoa. Can you relegate your struggle to you being stupid and leave the rest of ladies out of it? Its just a "tiny brain", the "lady" part has nothing to do with it!

  11. Samantha
    August 22, 2016 / 3:10 am

    Some of these make me cringe because of how often they are said.

    S .x ramblingsofayoungprgirl.blogspot.com

  12. August 26, 2016 / 12:33 pm

    I love you for inserting the word ‘cunty’!