Love Island Series 4, Episode 7. You can read the previous one here.
The reaction to the new Islanders continues as Eyal feels like the villa gods have delivered Megan from the heavens, or the forest, the sun or Derek Acorah – whichever spiritual being Eyal believes in.
Megan tells the girls she likes Alex but she also thinks Eyal and Niall are hot. BUT DO YOU LIKE THEM THOUGH?
Eyal tells the diary room that he is thankful for Megan as she seems like a proper woman. He is all about women – not girls. The nation breathe a sigh of relief and cancel-dialling 999.
Hayley sits down with Charlie and she tells him she’s hard work. She wants a guy that can handle her.
Charlie calls her a princess and instead of dashing him with the entire contents of her personalised water bottle, she agrees.
Hayley said things were too pressurised with Eyal – she doesn’t want to talk about trees.
Samira likes Charlie and she tells Rosie that he’s probably weighing up his options. She’s the type of person to take a step back. Forward, backward, step, ball, change, JAZZ-HANDS.
Josh thinks Laura (who is definitely 29 – we’ve seen the birth certificate) is beautiful. Could he try and poach her from Wes?
Alex takes Megan off for a chat. She’s got a case of the ‘likes’ too EVERY SENTENCE IS LITTERED WITH THEM. (Although, apparently this shows people who are, like, deep thinkers – article).
Alex thinks she’s deep and not just about who has the biggest biceps. But is she about who has the curliest hair? Eyal comes over to cock block.
At this point, Alex could’ve completely made himself the hero by turning to Eyal and confidently saying, ‘Give us a second mate – we’re just having a conversation’ thus asserting dominance.
Alex slopes of to the diary room to express his unhappiness with Eyal whilst simultaneously telling this frizzy-haired lothario that he loves him and is not bothered.
The new contests are allowed to take 3 other contestants of their choice on dates.
They head off into the back garden for picnics metres apart from one another.
Josh’s first pick is Laura, Megan’s first pick is Niall and Charlie’s is Samira.
Georgia tells the boys that she’s not bothered about Niall going but tells US at home that she’s fuming. The AMOUNT of faces in this house is not limited to one per person and I’m not coping.
Back to the field and Niall reckons he’s a gent for pouring champagne, Samira slid in Charlie’s DMs before and Laura is flattered by Josh.
Niall tells Megan that initially Georgia was his type – I smell an end to Niallgia.
Samira goes in for the kill and not-so-subtley tells Charlie that blonde hair and blue eyes is her type. What about no-eyebrows? However Charlie wants to see what happens (read: play the field).
In the next round of dates, Charlie picks Georgia, Megan goes for Eyal and Josh selects Hayley.
Georgia tells Charlie that she is keeping her options open. But she was fuming that Megan picked Niall? Ok babe.
Back at the villa and Laura tells Wes that Josh isn’t her type. Wes is chuffed and I imagine he does 57463 push ups in celebration.
According to Josh, Hayley is ticking his boxes. We don’t get to hear what those boxes are.
Megan asks Eyal what his type is on their date. He doesn’t have one – he just likes flow, a vibe and comfort.
Eyal’s type is a Rampant Rabbit.
Hayley also tells Josh she felt too much pressure with Eyal. Like when he asked her what her favourite animal was. I’m genuinely confused as to how she even makes it out of bed in the morning.
Eyal and Megan kiss. It’s cringey and loud.
For the last round of dates, Charlie chooses Hayley, Samira is picked by Josh and (huzzah) Alex gets a shot with Megan. Except not really as she’s already snogged Eyal.
There’s an inaudbile/unintelligible greeting between Charlie and Hayley. He cannot speak proper English and she can’t understand proper English. Possibly a very good match!
Megan tells Alex he wasn’t top of her list. The nation wince as hurtfully as Alex does every time someone touches his sunburn/
Samira goes for guys with personality. She’s out of luck in that house.
Charlie asks Hayley to compare with him with Josh. Who does she like more? She doesn’t know – she likes both.
Back to the Villa and Josh thinks there’s something with him and Hayley. Did they both not vote in the referendum?
Samira likes Charlie but she can tell Hayley likes him. We could have a potentially fiery love square on our hands here.
Eyal is going to tell Alex that he kissed Megan. Alex isn’t happy he didn’t know before his date that Eyal had kissed her but of course he doesn’t tell him this.
We’re running out of time for this episode for a proper challenge so it’s another game of CRINGEY DARES.
The girls pick a boy’s name from a box and then pick a dare from the other box.
Dani and Josh must eat a banana together til they kiss. Jack is not happy. Bless him.
Hayley has to lick Adam’s earlobe. She doesn’t know what an earlobe is.
Josh has to lick Samira’s toe and I can feel my mid-break microwaved Gyoza making their way back up.
Perhaps ominously, they then have a four way kiss with Charlie and Hayley.
Megan had to suck Eyal’s finger but he kissed her instead. I would give anything for Alex to do a Tim from the Office glare at the camera.
Laura and Niall must lick each other’s faces.
Megan covered Alex face in Lipstick.
Charlie and Samira snog for 20 seconds.
Alex poured honey on his chest for Rosie to lick it off – the rest of the girls take part too.
Gam Over, what laughs, lol lol lol.
The Hideaway is open for one lucky couple and Wes and Laura are chosen.
They dance for each other with roses in their mouths, they cheers their one week anniversary. and Wes reveals this is the best week he’s ever had with a girl. I’m warming to them.
PREVIEW OF DOOM
Before Love Island leaves our screens for the evening we are treated with a preview of tonight’s show where it looks like things are KICKING OFF with Rosie and Adam.
So has he text another girl? Megan? Hayley? Are the rumours true that he was dating Hayley on the outside? OR that he was dating Rosie on the outside?
We’ll tune in at 9pm to find out!
Ben’s Comment of The Day: After his latest loss, the Doctor is terminal.
Thanks for taking up the medicine puns babe.